How Did We Get Here?
by Nashvillefan
Summary: This is a response to the July Fanfic Challenge: Write a story Including a message and a character(s) other than Rayna and Deacon. It takes place several weeks after the accident. Rayna and Deacon have not been speaking. Will her letter spark a conversation?
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys! This is for the July fanfic challenge. Thank you to KarenES for the beta-read. Please read and review :)

_Deacon,_

_Let me start by saying that I am sorry. And that I miss you. It's been four weeks since the accident. We haven't talked since you left the hospital the day after that. I understand that you are angry and I know you have every right to be. But since you will not take my calls, I figured a letter would be my best bet. After all, this whole thing began with a letter, the letter you wrote me 14 years ago. The one telling me that you were going to get sober. The one that sparked our final fight. And our final make-up before you headed off to rehab the last time. _

_That night, the night after I got your letter, was the night Maddie was conceived. I left that morning intending on waiting for you. But shortly after, I met Teddy. He was stable, he picked up the pieces that you had broken Deacon. Believe it or not, loving you was and still is the hardest thing I've done. You have had my heart since we were 16 years old. But babe, you are also the only one that has ever broken it into a million pieces, more than once. When the first four times in rehab didn't stick, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what I was doing that was so wrong. Each time you fell off the wagon, I lost a part of myself. It was like, no matter how much I loved you, it wasn't enough, I wasn't enough to make you stay sober. And that absolutely killed me on the inside._

_By the time I met Teddy I was a shell. A shell of the woman you fell in love with. I had nothing left because you, you were my everything, but I wasn't enough for you, or so I thought. It was six weeks after our last night together that I found out I was pregnant. I told Teddy. I told him there was a 50/50 chance the baby was yours. He asked me what I wanted. I told him I wanted a good home for the baby, a stable foundation for the baby. So he asked me to marry him._

_But damn it Deacon. You think it was easy for me to make that choice. It wasn't. It broke my heart all over again, because I knew choosing Teddy meant walking away from you. We didn't do a paternity test until well after Maddie was born. But I knew, just by her eyes and the way she smiled that she was yours. But at that point there was no turning back. I know you think I should have waited for you. And I know you think I should have told you. But Deacon, how was that going to work? I didn't know that the 5th time in rehab was going to stick. And I couldn't take that chance. If I hadn't been enough to keep you sober, how was a baby going to suddenly make everything okay? I honestly think it took losing me to make you stay sober babe. And I don't want that to sound harsh. But each time before, I was there. And I was always going to be, so you knew it didn't matter if you really stayed sober because I would still be there. I loved you that much, and you knew it._

_Well Deacon, I couldn't do that anymore and I couldn't do that to her. And once I found out Maddie was yours, was I just supposed to tell you? Make you fall off the wagon? Make you even more angry, knowing that another man was going to raise her every day? These are all questions I don't have answers to babe. When we decided to keep that secret, we did it for Maddie. Because how in the hell would that get explained to a child, hmm?_

_But there is something else I want you to know. I have never stopped loving you. Not for one second. After you got out the 5th time and you stayed sober, I regretted the choice I made every day. I regretted not waiting. And once we knew for sure that Maddie was yours, that regret doubled. But I was proud of you, and so happy you were staying sober. I couldn't risk hurting Maddie and I couldn't risk taking away everything you had worked for. Because it scared me, thinking about what you might do if you found out. _

_And as it turned out, I was correct. I didn't want to be. I wanted to be wrong. I wanted to believe that we could talk through it, that you could listen and try and understand. That you could be the man that I've loved since I was 16, the man that beat his addiction. The man that fathered my child. The man that was 13 years sober. The one I fell in love with all over again in the weeks before the accident. And it is all of these things combined that break my heart yet again. Because part of me doesn't want to love you, not now. Not after everything. Not after all of my worst fears were confirmed. But I still do. _

_Because I know deep down, that as angry as you are, you still love me too. That as hurt and upset as you are, you regret your reaction to finding out the truth. And I know that at some point we are going to work through this and fix things. For Maddie's sake, we have to. But until that time comes, I just needed you to know why I did what I did. And that if I could go back and change it, I would. But I can't, so I hope we can talk sometime soon. And I meant what I said, I love you, with all of my heart. So please, please don't keep shutting me out._

_Love,_

_Ray_

Deacon read the letter a second time, as Coleman sat across from him in the booth. The tears in his eyes had started to dance across his cheeks as they rolled to his jawline, falling onto the paper he held in front of him. He let out a shaky breath, followed by a heavy sigh.

"Thanks for bringing this to me Cole."

"Of course. Nothin I wouldn't do for the two of you."

"How is she?"

"Fine physically. Emotionally is a different story. Everything with you two. Not to mention, Teddy is trying to fight for sole custody of the girls."

"Why in the hell would he do that?"

"Because Rayna isn't budgin on the fact that you deserve parental rights just as much as her and Teddy."

"Oh. God. Did she say when things will get decided or if there is anything I can do?"

"No. But there is one thing you could probably do."

"What's that?"

"Talk to her man. And Maddie. She asked about you too."

"I don't know Cole. I don't know if I'm ready yet."

"Come on man, that letter had to say something to ya."

"Did you read it?" he asked Coleman, his eyes pleading for the truth.

"Yeah, she asked me to. Asked me for my opinion on it."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Do you agree with her?" Deacon asked, brushing a hand across his face as he set the letter down.

"Deacon, I think Rayna made the choice that was best given the situation. It's easy for you to point a finger at her now, that she should have told you, that she should have waited. But think about how you were back then. I think she hit the nail on the head when she said, had you not lost her, you wouldn't have gotten sober. That's true, because she was always there and was always gonna be there. Didn't matter. Walking away was her only choice then."

"Damn it Cole. 13 years. That's how much I missed," he choked, his voice breaking.

"But Deacon, you were still a part of her life. Still a part of those girls' lives. Yes, not the role you should have been playing. But it was a role nonetheless. But man, you need to man up and figure this out. Now that Maddie knows, are you really gonna walk away, because you're angry that this secret was kept from you?"

"Cole, Ray and I coulda had a family, we coulda been together this whole time."

"Deacon, c'mon man. Do you honestly think that had she waited and had she told you, it woulda kept you sober? If Rayna wasn't enough, would her and Maddie suddenly have been enough? I mean honestly, take a long hard look at how you were back then. And tell me with 100 percent certainty that it woulda been enough."

"I," he paused, taking another deep breath, "don't really know. I can't answer that Cole."

"Exactly. And neither could Rayna. So before you toss the letter aside and continue to ignore her, put yourself in her shoes. And let that last part resonate for a minute. Despite everything she still loves you, still wants you, still wants you to be with her."

"I don't deserve her Cole. I don't deserve yet another chance. I confirmed all of her worst fears with this whole thing. Why? Why the hell can't she just let me go?"

"Jesus man, that's what you want. An excuse to crawl into that dark pit again. C'mon man. Why can't you understand that you do deserve to be happy? And you deserve to be with the woman you love. And honestly, you two were back together when this all went down. That means an adult relationship. Well, this silent treatment, not exactly an adult component to a relationship."

Deacon sat in silence for a few more minutes, drinking his coffee, looking from Coleman to the letter. After another deep breath, he finally spoke.

"Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything my friend."

"Wanna take me over there?"

"Over there? As in Rayna's?"

"Yeah. This silence has gone on long enough."

They pulled up to the house as Deacon sat uneasy in the passenger seat. Coleman had called Rayna on the drive over, confirming that she was home and that the girls were with Teddy. After another minute of silence Coleman finally spoke.

"Ya gonna go in there or what?"

"Yeah, just, uh, gettin my nerve to actually move."

"Well, I'll be here when you are done."

Deacon looked at him, raising an eyebrow, "You know this might be more than a 5 minute conversation right?"

"Yeah, but how else will you get home?"

"They have those things called cabs Cole. I'll call you when I get home. Or better yet, let's do coffee at Charlie Bob's in the mornin. Say 8?"

"All right Deacon. And listen if you-"

"I know Cole, if I need anything, call."

With that, Deacon climbed out of the car and walked up the path to the front door. It felt like miles and miles of distance. He wasn't even inside yet and already he was nervous. His palms were sweating. His heart was beating faster. After a long drawn out breath, he ran his hand through his hair before his finger found the doorbell.

A few seconds later he heard footsteps, then the rattle of the handle as Rayna pulled the door open. His breath caught in his throat when he took in the sight of her. She looked as beautiful as ever. Running shorts, an old fitted t-shirt, her hair in a messy bun on top of her head. He also noticed the few bandages still on her wrist and arm. This made him blink as a flash of pain and anger flooded his eyes.

"Well, uh, come in," she finally said, stepping out of the doorway and nodding him in.

She walked into the kitchen as he followed her in. She leaned against the counter by the refrigerator and he took a seat at the counter on the other side of the island. He had to put as much space between them as possible. Because already, being alone with her was making him forget why he wasn't talking to her.

"Listen, Deac-"

"Listen, Ray-" he stopped, realizing they had both started talking at the same time. He smiled to himself. When he looked at her she was smiling, waiting for him to proceed.

"Ray, yes, I'm angry. I just can't believe you kept somethin' that important from me. I fathered your child. Our child." He drew a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. His leg was bouncing so nervously that he finally stood and began pacing.

"But look, I get it. I read your letter a dozen times. Back then, with me, the only guarantee was that I was most likely gonna fall off the wagon. And just as much as you didn't know my last time in rehab was gonna stick, I didn't know either. I don't have the answers for all the woulda, coulda, shoulda nonsense. But Ray, that last part, about you not wanting to love me, why do you? Why do you when all I do is hurt you?" he asked as he finally stopped, placing his palms on the island, gripping the edge as he focused on her intently.

"Well babe, I love you because I've never not loved you. Even when it wasn't you Deacon, it was still you. You've been in my dreams every night for the last 14 years. Truth is, I gave you my heart a long time ago. Despite the times you've broken it, all the good that's come from us picks up those pieces and puts 'em right back together," she finished with a simple shrug of her shoulders.

"Then why choose Teddy? You loved me that much but you couldn't wait?"

"Because babe, findin out I was pregnant was my breaking point. If it had just been me, I woulda been right back in your arms the minute you got outta rehab. But it wasn't. And as much as I wanted you, knowin that I had a baby to consider meant I had to put us second. I couldn't choose the heartache that I had lived for her too."

Deacon understood what she was saying and he knew she was being honest. There was this mix of sincerity, regret, and pain in her eyes that damn near killed him. There was so much raw emotion and he knew deep down he could no longer blame her for the choice she had made for their daughter. But that didn't mean he had to like it and that didn't mean he had to fall into her arms. So he gave her a nod, turned on his heels and headed for the door.

"Deacon wait!" Her voice cracked and the last word barely made it out. The pain in her voice stopped him in his tracks. He didn't hear her approach, but simply felt her arms wrap around his waist as she rested her chin on his back.

"Don't go," she murmured against his flannel button down.

Finally, after a few deep breaths, he turned in her arms. Her eyes were clenched shut as she buried her face in his chest as her body began to heave with quiet sobs. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly.

They stood like this until her crying stopped and her breathing leveled. Finally she drew her face back and looked up at him. When he finally forced his gaze to connect with hers, his heart melted. God he really did love her. So much it hurt. He brought his hands to her cheeks and wiped away the tears that still lingered.

"Ray, I'm sorry. For everything. I really am."

"Oh Deacon, please don't tell me that we're over. That this is it. That this is all you and I get. A whole lifetime of heartache and no happy ending?"

"Ray, it's far from over."

"Deacon, babe, I love you so much. I just wanna fix this."

"I love you too darlin, but the only thing that's gonna fix this is time."

"Okay. I understand. But can you stay for a while? We can talk. We can just sit. I just wanna be close to you for a while."

He smiled and nodded. She took his hand and led him into her music room. This had always been his favorite spot in the house. And he was glad she had picked it. They sat on the over-sized lounge. Deacon sat back against the corner and Rayna snuggled in beside him, her head resting on his shoulder. Deacon began drawing lazy circles on her back. Neither spoke for a while. As Deacon looked around the room, he smiled at the many photos of Rayna and the girls. Without looking up, Rayna knew that he was taking in the photos.

"I'm truly sorry babe. I never wanted to hurt you like this," she sighed, tracing her finger along the buttons of his shirt.

"I know," he said, before kissing the top of her head.

Instantly, they both shivered at the intimacy of that simple kiss. Both realizing that the air in the room was quickly changing. Rayna adjusted slightly as she tilted her head up to look Deacon in the eyes. He met her gaze and paused for a moment. Almost instantaneously, they moved at the same time, bringing their faces toward each other.

There was no hesitation, just forward movement by them both until their lips touched. Rayna let out of heavy sigh at the initial contact. And Deacon didn't know whether to laugh or cry. But after a brief pause, both of them taking in the moment, Deacon brushed several more soft kisses against her lips before tracing the seam of her lips with his tongue. When she parted her lips and their tongues connected, it made Deacon's head spin. The rush of finally kissing her again was almost too much. Because up until Coleman had called, Deacon was sure Rayna had given up on him.

Suddenly his mind stopped wandering and he refocused his attention as Rayna's hand wriggled into his hair. He brought his hand up to cup her cheek as their kiss continued. He couldn't believe this was happening but all he could think about was needing her body closer to him. This thought had no more than run through his mind as Rayna's leg looped over his waist. He quickly rolled to his back on the lounge, pulling her with him so she lay on top of him.

Finally needing to break for air she rested her forehead against his. He looked into her eyes and simply smiled, trying not to notice how thin she was. He could tell she had lost weight, her body was so much lighter against him. Noticing the concern in his eyes, she spoke.

"What'sa matter babe?" she asked, tracing the stubble on his jaw with her finger.

"You're thin Ray. Have you not been eatin or somethin?"

"Not really babe. I can't eat, can't sleep. Knowin that everything is such a mess," she sighed, breaking their eye contact.

"Well darlin, I'm here now. And everything is gonna be okay. So ya need to start sleeping and eatin right," he grinned as he attempted to feign a scolding tone.

"I'm glad you are here, but there is so much that needs fixin."

"I know, and we will fix it. But tonight, that's not what we're gonna worry about. You need to sleep."

"Oh babe, I can't sleep with you here, like this," she smiled as her fingers continued to twirl around the buttons of his shirt. Slowly she undid the first few, until his hand gently found hers.

"Ray, not here, not like this. We've just talked some of this out. Let's be patient, hmm?"

"Oh you're right. It's just bein around you this close makes me forget everything," she said, letting out a deep breath. She looked at him once more before leaning in for another kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

A continuation of the response for the July fanfic challenge. I big thanks to my reviewers and KarenES for the beta read! Enjoy :)

Chapter 2

4 weeks later

Rayna glanced down at the screen on her phone. Deacon's name was flashing. Quickly, she silenced the call. Focusing her attention back to Marshall and James, the new head of brand management at the label, she listened attentively to what they were saying: her own arena tour, 65 cities over the next five months. Her album sales had spiked since the accident and they wanted to capitalize on this. As Marshall was breaking down the payout from such a massive tour, Rayna glanced at Bucky, giving him the signal that she was ready for this to be over. As Marshall finished his presentation, Bucky cleared his throat.

"Well gentlemen, I think that sounds great, but Rayna has another engagement at noon. Can we wrap this up for today?" he asked with a polite smile.

"Of course, not a problem. But we need a decision within the week. We would like to kick this off in two week's time," James stated, exuding an arrogance and charm that Rayna wasn't sure about.

She quickly studied him. He had tan skin, which she naturally attributed to his infinite pool lounging as opposed to actually working. But he was attractive. He had dark hair, longer than Deacon's, and she could tell that if it weren't styled and combed back in a distinguished manner, he could easily brush it to the side with a shake of his head. His jaw line was very prominent and his smile was mysterious, but sexy. Then there were those dark brown eyes.

As she finished her internal summation, she felt her cheeks flush as he caught her gaze. Quickly looking away, she realized everyone was looking at her awaiting a response.

"Okay, I will let you know within the week," she smiled weakly, before nodding and standing.

She shook James' hand, caught off guard with the way he lingered. Then she gave Marshall a hug, accepting his kiss on her cheek, before smiling and quickly exiting the room. All the while she could feel James' eyes on her.

Once out in the hallway, she let out a heavy sigh. Bucky turned his gaze to her, studying her as she brought the phone to her ear, pressing play for Deacon's voicemail.

"Hey Ray, it's me. So I wanted to let you know that the reservations have been made. I will pick you up at noon. Depending on traffic we should hit the Ozarks by around 8. Just make sure your bags are packed. Love you."

Rayna smiled to herself. Then felt a nervous jitter filter through her stomach. She and Deacon had spent the last month starting over. They had actually been dating. Dinner, movies, plays, anything they could manage the time for. They had not been intimate, beyond some hefty make out sessions in the front seat of his new SUV. He hadn't even copped a feel yet, besides a very gentle, accidental graze across her breast the night before. But it had allowed them time to heal. It had also allowed Deacon time to build a stronger relationship with the girls.

He had had several outings with Maddie and Daphne together, as well as ones with just he and Maddie. Almost every night that Rayna had the girls in the last four weeks, Deacon was over for breakfast, lunch, or dinner; or all three. Guitar lessons, songwriting sessions, and board games had become a ritual between Deacon and the girls. Rayna had even noticed that they had stopped calling him "Uncle Deacon," and in the last week, both girls uttered "I love you" when he would head for the door.

Rayna smiled to herself at the thought as she placed her phone back in her pocket. Looking over to meet Bucky's gaze she let out a laugh.

"What Buck?"

"You excited about your weekend getaway?"

"Yes I am. Four days, just the two of us."

"I'm glad, y'all deserve this. But tell me, Teddy and the girls all know, correct?"

"Yes Buck. Maddie and Daphne are excited to spend a long weekend with Teddy and Peggy shopping for the baby. Surprisingly, they have come around to the idea of a new baby sibling," she sighed. "They were heartbroken at first. The news was a stark reality to both of them that mommy and daddy hadn't been happy. But over the last couple months, they've both warmed up to the idea. They like seeing Teddy and I smile again."

"Well that's good Rayna. But do you really think they are happy? Or is it two girls not wanting to hurt their parents?" he asked, as gently as he could.

"Ya know Buck, I really do think they are happy. As much as Teddy and I tried to fake our happiness, they saw right through it. Kids are pretty receptive to stuff. For the final months of our marriage, Teddy and I carried the weight of the world. Now we don't. And the girls noticed. In fact, Daphne mentioned that to me the other day."

"Really?" Bucky cocked an eyebrow at her as they approached the elevator.

"Yes, we were in the car, coming home from the store. She piped up and told me that she was glad I was finally happy again. I asked what she meant. She proceeded to tell me that I didn't hunch my shoulders anymore around Daddy, and that I didn't crinkle my forehead anymore when I talked to him. And that I am always smiling now. Not to mention, there isn't any more yelling in the house after I think she and Maddie are asleep."

"Wow, did Maddie add anything to this little chat?" he smiled, pressing the down arrow to call the elevator.

"Yeah, she informed me that I wasn't touching up my gray roots as frequently. Apparently there is a correlation between unhappiness and gray hair," she stated with a chuckle as they boarded the car.

"Well Rayna. I have to agree with the girls. I haven't seen you this happy in years. And I am glad it's working out for the girls too."

"Thanks Buck, I appreciate it," she paused, "so I am going to ask Deacon back as my lead guitarist for this new tour. What do you think?"

"I think that's a great idea actually. You going to ask him on your trip?"

"Yeah I think so. If he agrees, then my answer to Marshall will be yes," she smiled brightly as they entered the lobby.

"Okay, that sounds great Rayna."

"But Buck, if he says no, this thing is not going to happen."

"Okay," he sighed, "I guess that means you will have to do a good job of convincing him," he smiled, letting out a small laugh. Then he leaned in, giving Rayna a quick kiss on the cheek.

"I'll do my best Buck. See you on Monday."

"Enjoy the trip Rayna."

Meanwhile, Deacon sat in the booth looking at Coleman, waiting for his reaction to Deacon's confession. After a few minutes of silence, Deacon spoke again.

"C'mon Cole, you've gotta say somethin"

"Ah Deacon, man, I never thought I'd see the day when you were nervous about a long weekend with a lady friend, especially Rayna. I mean, the physical side of you two has never been a problem. Do I need to remind you of that Thanksgiving extravaganza I walked in on?"

Deacon blushed at the memory. It had been the second Thanksgiving he and Rayna had shared. As per the usual, dinner had been at Lamar's. At this point in time, Deacon had yet to develop a drinking problem. That wouldn't happen until Thanksgiving number five. No, this time around, things were great between him and Ray. Lamar wasn't fond of him, be he hadn't started disappointing Lamar's daughter. Their first single had just hit number one the day before, so they were on a celebratory high.

Gathered around the dinner table, they were somewhere between the main course and dessert, when Rayna's hand began brushing up and down his leg, ever so gently brushing against his groin. He had cleared his throat attempting to stop her, but that had only encouraged her. As he ignored her hand, he was attempting to focus on the political discourse between Lamar, Coleman, Tandy, and her boyfriend Tim, or was it Tom? Regardless, Rayna quickly cast aside the subtleties and began rubbing him gently through his pants. When his breath began quickening, he cleared his throat once more and leaned toward her to whisper in her ear.

"Hallway bathroom, five minutes."

Then he had announced to the table that something he had eaten wasn't settling quite right and he was going to step out for some air. Everyone looked at him with concern and Tandy acknowledged that his cheeks were flushed. Rayna however, had given him a wicked grin.

He quickly darted to the hallway bathroom by the garage entrance. It was on the opposite side of the main floor and he knew they wouldn't be bothered. After what seemed like an eternity, he saw the door knob turn. He grinned from ear to ear when Rayna entered, quickly shutting the door. She smiled at him as she leaned against it. Without hesitation, he grabbed her and pulled her to him. Their lips met and he was already pushing her skirt up around her waist, as he turned them, backing her against the sink.

Just as quickly, he had pulled her panties down and undone his belt, still massaging his tongue against hers. As Rayna's hands found the waistband of his boxers, he had lifted her up, setting her on the edge of the sink. His fingers made their way to her core as she pushed his boxers down past his hips. Inching forward she brought her legs up and wrapped them around his waist, drawing him in. With no more room for hesitation, Deacon entered her. He had just begun moving in and out of her, when the door opened.

Both of their eyes met a horrified Coleman. He was stunned. He quickly mumbled an apology and pulled the door shut. After a fit of laughter, Deacon and Rayna resumed their prior engagement. About fifteen minutes later, they had returned to the table, neither one able to look Coleman in the eye.

Clearing his throat, Deacon's mind came back to reality. Grinning at Coleman, he spoke again.

"Well Cole, this is different. We started over. A clean slate. No secrets, we're building from the ground up. But honestly, with Ray, the, uh, intimate side always came naturally, no hesitation. Now here we are. We haven't even gone to second base in this whole new thing," he paused, "so ya damn right I'm nervous, I'm a train wreck. I mean, what if the, uh, the equipment don't work or somethin? All this build up over the last two month an all."

"Okay man, ya need to calm down. Like I said, you and Rayna have never had an issue with this. Clean slate or not, you two will be fine. This weekend is all about rediscovering each other or however it was you said she explained it. So just go with it. Honestly, you keep worryin and the equipment probably won't work," he said with a chuckle as he took a sip of his coffee.

"Thanks Cole, thanks for that final thought," he smiled, laughing as he checked his watch. He had two hours before he picked her up.

Sure he could laugh, but his stomach was in knots. He was a bundle of nerves. Possibly more nervous than the first time he and Rayna had made love. It had been a similar situation. A long weekend getaway. Only it was to his cabin and she had lied to her father. But he had known it was going to happen, and he had known that he would be her first. So naturally, he had been in a panic. And now, nearly 25 years later, he was experiencing that panic all over again.

**2 hours late**r:

He pulled into her driveway at 12 on the nose. He had triple checked his packing list: charcoal, firewood, lighter fluid, matches, bug spray, fishing poles, a cooler full of food and beverages, and clothes. Thankfully the cabin they were renting came furnished. They had talked about going to his cabin, but this time around, had decided a clean slate meant making memories somewhere new.

After a long, deep breath, he made his way to the front door. Within seconds, she answered the door, bags in hand.

"Ready for this babe?" she asked, pecking his lips.

"I think so, are you?" he asked sheepishly, taking her bags.

"Always ready for an adventure with you," she beamed, taking his free hand as they walked to his SUV.

He pulled open the door for her, helping her in, before closing it and placing her bags in the back seat. He climbed in his side and started the engine.

"Here we go," he smiled as he pulled out of the drive.

The car ride was filled with simple conversation about the girls, new music Rayna was working on, and how they planned on spending this weekend together. As talk of their four days alone began to unfold, Deacon quickly became hushed.

"What's the matter babe?" she asked, switching the radio off.

"Nothin," he replied, shaking his head, keeping his focus on the road.

"C'mon babe," she pressed, placing her hand on his arm.

He glanced quickly at her hand, then her. She was turned toward him in her seat, her eyes practically melting away any defense he had. Letting out a heavy sigh, he placed his free hand on top of hers.

"I'm nervous Ray."

"What? Why babe?"

"Ray, you know why."

"No I don't think I do."

"Rayna," he used the exasperated tone he usually gave her when she was being difficult.

"Deacon," she matched his tone.

"Well if I gotta spell it out for you," he sighed, "I'm nervous about being alone with you," quickly removing his hand from hers.

"What? Deacon, why on earth are you nervous about that?"

"Are you..what..seriously, Rayna?"

"Deacon, I don't get it babe, care to explain?"

"Rayna," he used that tone again, before letting out a shaky breath, "we've started over. A clean slate. No sex, nothing. Well, we've never done that before. Ever. I mean, except when you were married. But even then, there was still that sexual tension. Well, the last two months, there hasn't been that same dynamic. So, yeah, I'm nervous."

"Deacon, let me get this straight, you're worried that we've somehow lost that physical connection because we took a two month break from sex to rebuild our relationship?"

"Well, it sounds silly when you say it like that. But yeah. And talkin to Coleman didn't help, so." He trailed off realizing he had just revealed more than he needed to.

"You talked to Coleman about our sex life?"

"Well, uh, I mean, not in a detailed manner of speaking, but just to express that I was nervous."

Rayna paused, noticing a sign up ahead on her right.

"Hey, slow down," she stated quickly, pointing at the sign for a nature reserve, "turn in here."

Deacon was confused, but complied with her request. They followed the road for about a mile before they entered into the desolate park. Off in the distance there was a shelter. As Deacon stopped the car he noticed signs for hiking trails, a lookout point, and some sort of freshwater spring. Putting the car in park, he looked over at her.

"What are we doin Ray?"

"I need to remind you of somethin."

"What's that?" he asked, confusion written all over his face.

She gave him a slight grin before unbuckling her seat belt and reaching over to switch off the ignition. As she did so, she took the opportunity to unbuckle his seat belt as well. Just as Deacon raised an eyebrow at her, she quickly climbed over the armrest separating them as she straddled his lap. Taken aback by her advance, Deacon quickly recovered, running his hands up the backs of her thighs before settling them on her ass. Resting her palms on his chest, she smiled down at him.

"What are you doin Ray?" he asked with a grin.

"Showin you there is nothin to worry about."

"Oh yeah? How ya gonna do that?"

Without another word, she brought her lips to his, hungrily tracing the seam of his lips with her tongue. Deacon gladly parted his lips and their tongues met. As his hands caressed her bottom, Rayna relaxed her legs, settling herself in his lap. As their hips met, Rayna could feel him growing beneath her. Gently she rocked her hips before reaching behind her, grasping his hand that was still firmly gripping her.

With her free hand, she undid the button on her jeans. She lifted her hips, breaking their contact. Turning his hand in hers, she pressed his palm against her stomach, his fingers brushing the top of her panties, and gently eased it below. When his fingers connected with the wetness between her thighs, her breath hitched and Deacon let out a low moan.

"See babe, you've got nothin to worry about when it comes to turning me on," she smiled.

He began to slide his hand farther into her panties and she felt his fingers curl upward, ready to begin what would be a very rewarding process, but she gently grabbed his wrist.

"Oh babe, not here," she grinned, "I just needed you to remember. We still got another hour on the road."

"You serious Ray?" he smiled.

"Yes," she smiled back.

But he was stronger than her. Surprising her, his hand moved forward, sharply, his fingers reaching their desired destination. At this Rayna let out a loud moan. With a flick of his wrist, he touched her in all the places he had intended and her breath hitched sharply.

"Deacon," she moaned, "not like this."

Without hesitation, he quickly retreated his hand and her eyes snapped open. He was grinning from ear to ear. He quickly brought his mouth to hers, kissing her deeply before breaking their contact.

"Okay babe, not like this. Let's get to that damn cabin then."


	3. Chapter 3

Here is chapter 3! There will be one more. Thank you for the reviews. And thank you again to KarenES for the beta read :)

Chapter 3

They made the rest of the drive to the cabin in silence, stealing glances at each other occasionally. Once they pulled into the resort at the Ozarks, Deacon went into the lodge to check them in. Rayna began nervously fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. After several minutes Deacon reemerged, quickly making his way to the door as he jumped in, bringing the engine to life once more.

"Sorry, I took the liberty of requesting a bit of a change to our reservation," he said with a smile.

"What sort of change?"

"Oh, you will see."

Pulling back onto the drive, they passed cabin after cabin. After a few minutes, the cabins became dotted farther apart along the road. Making a left turn, they came into a cul de sac, parking in front of the sole cabin. He looked once more at Rayna as he put the SUV in park and switched off the engine.

"We got the last cabin, and we are across the lake from the lodge. This one is reserved for special guests. I guess it's the vacation home for the owner of this resort, and several others here at the Ozarks."

"Really? So we will be all alone, huh?"

"Pretty much," he smiled, "well, let's unload shall we?"

Rayna nodded before opening the door and climbing out. She grabbed her bags from the back seat and took in her surroundings. The cabin was situated on a hill overlooking the lake. It was a beautiful, two-story log cabin and the tree lines on each side made it private, despite being nestled among several other cabins in the resort. Deacon had his arms full as they made their way up the front steps. He opened the door for her and switched on the nearest light.

It was a wide open floor plan. The open staircase was to the left and it connected with a loft upstairs that overlooked the whole main floor. There was a large dining room to the right. As she walked in, past the entry way, she was blown away. Taking the few steps down to the living room floor, the whole backside of the house was nothing but windows. A massive wrap-around island to her right made a divider between the living room and the kitchen. Four solid oak bar stools were positioned along it. In the far corner of the living room was a gorgeous limestone fireplace. Down the hallway to her right she saw a door and assumed it was a bathroom. Deacon confirmed this as he dropped the cooler on the counter and made a beeline for it.

The living room was furnished with solid oak end tables and a coffee table. The plush leather sofa, loveseat, and chair filled the room. The black marble counter tops in the kitchen contrasted with the rustic look of the cupboards. And then there was the giant subzero fridge. It was all a bit too fancy for a cabin, but it was beautiful nonetheless.

Wandering down the hallway to her left she found the master bedroom. A king sized, four poster bed was situated in the middle. There was another fireplace in the corner and two plush chairs were situated in front of the door leading to the deck. She slid open the glass door and walked outside. It was breathtaking. The moon was just starting to peek out, reflecting on the water. Across the lake, she noticed the faint orange glow situated behind each of the cabins. It was then that she noticed a slight chill in the air.

Almost instantly, she felt his arms around her waist, pulling her close as he rested his chin on her shoulder. Naturally, Rayna leaned back against him, resting a hand on top of his.

"Perfect night for a fire Ray. What do ya think?"

"Do we have an outdoor fire pit?"

"Yeah, down on the basement patio."

"Basement? There are three floors to this place?"

He nodded over the edge of the railing, "Well, we are up in the air Ray," chuckling before kissing her temple.

"What on earth are we gonna do with a place this big for four days Deacon?" she grinned as he continued to nuzzle her neck.

"I am sure we can think of somethin darlin. Now come on, let's make some sandwiches and go cozy up by a fire. There is a nice big couch type thing out there on the patio."

They made quick work of all that needed to be unpacked. Rayna took care of their clothes, placing them in drawers, and situating their toiletries in the master bathroom. Deacon put the firewood, fishing supplies, and food away. After ten minutes Rayna emerged from the bedroom in leggings and a sweatshirt of Deacon's. He had just put a sandwich on each of their plates when he looked up to see her approaching the island. His breath caught in his throat as he scanned her appearance. She blushed slightly before breaking the silence, as she made her way around the counter to him.

"This place is beautiful babe. A bit fancy for a cabin, but I am glad we have this all to ourselves. No interruptions all weekend," she smiled leaning back against the counter, gently brushing her hand over his.

He was just about to speak when her phone chimed.

"No interruptions huh?" he asked with a pained expression.

"I'm sorry babe," she sighed, glancing down at the screen, "it's Teddy, I better answer it."

"Hey Teddy, everything okay?"

"Rayna, I'm sorry to bother you, I know you are on a vacation with Deacon. But listen, something happened tonight. Everyone is okay, but I didn't want you to come home and see the brace and freak out," Teddy replied with a heavy sigh.

"A brace, what kind of brace? What happened?"

Deacon went from annoyed to worried as he heard the urgency in her tone as she began to pace back and forth.

"It's nothing major Rayna. Peggy and the girls were running to the store. A car rear ended them. Daphne sprained her wrist. She has a brace that she has to wear for a week."

"A sprained wrist? Oh, my poor baby. Is she in a lot of pain?" Rayna asked quietly, trying to mask the sadness in her voice. She desperately wanted to hug her youngest child right now.

"No, she isn't in any pain. Now listen, I don't want this to ruin your weekend. I just wanted you to know okay? Everything is fine. So enjoy your time with Deacon okay?"

Rayna sighed. She was happy Teddy had become okay with she and Deacon since the accident. They had both agreed that they would support each other as long as the girls were happy. But still, she wished she could be home with her girls.

"Um, yeah, all right. Thanks for the call Teddy."

She set the phone down and tried to fight the tears welling in her eyes. Not able to bring herself to look Deacon in the eyes, she simply crossed the kitchen, wrapping her arms around his waist as she buried her face in his chest. He held her tight, stroking her hair until the sobs stopped and her body stopped shaking.

"What is it Ray? What happened?"

"Daphne sprained her wrist," she paused, looking up at him, "the girls were with Peggy and they got rear ended at a stoplight."

"That's it?" he asked, confused at her response. From the panicked expression, the way she had clung to him, sobbing, he thought something awful had happened.

"That's it?" Rayna said, anger very apparent in her voice, "that's it? My babies were in a car accident Deacon. That is a bit of a big deal," she looked away, removing herself from his arms, turning her back to him.

"Ray, I didn't mean it like that," he said, letting out a heavy sigh, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"How did you mean it then Deacon?" brushing his arm off of her.

"Rayna," he grabbed her wrist, stopping her from walking away from him.

She spun around. The combination of tears and anger that flashed across her eyes made him pause. She was beyond angry at him. Attempting to pull her arm free, he tightened his grip slightly.

"Let go of me Deacon," she grumbled, her volume rising slightly.

"No Ray. Damn it. I didn't mean that it wasn't a big deal. I was only meanin that a sprained wrist isn't bad compared to what could have happened," he was looking at her apologetically, a hand on each of her wrists.

She looked down at his hands, then back up to his face. He was smiling at her. What in the hell was he smiling for?

"What in the hell are you grinning about?"

"You are cute when you are feisty," he chuckled, slipping his hands around her waist, pulling her against him.

He leaned in teasing the exposed flesh on her neck and shoulder, where the baggy sweater hung off of her. Rayna sighed at his touch, before anger coursed through her once more. Her daughters had been in a car accident and he was thinking about sex. She placed her palms on his chest and gently nudged him backwards.

"What's wrong Ray?" his eyes filled with concern once more.

"You don't get it do you? _My_ girls were in an accident. Sure they weren't hurt, but they could have been, and your only thought is sex!" she yelled, louder than she had intended.

The words pierced his ears. He knew she hadn't meant it to come out the way it did, yet he couldn't help but feel the sting of the emphasis she had placed on "my."

"Your girls Ray? You forget that one of 'em is mine? And that I love them both as my own?"

With a final heavy sigh, he reached around her grabbing his plate off the counter. He opened the french door to the deck, not bothering to close it as he made his way down the spiral steps to the lower patio.

Rayna stood at the counter, running through their whole conversation several times. Wow, she really had dropped the ball on this one. She knew he wasn't being insensitive. He was exactly right. But since their accident, she was still skittish with cars. And her daughters had been in an accident without her there. Her sensitivity to the subject amped up her feelings about it. She drew a deep breath before opening the fridge. She pulled out two water bottles before closing it. Grabbing her plate she headed out the door, closing it behind her. Quietly she made her way down the steps.

She smiled at what she saw. Deacon had pillows and a blanket on the large outdoor sofa. A small fire was crackling in the pit, and candles lined the tables on either end of the patio. He had just finished lighting the final candle when he turned around to meet her gaze. He said nothing, simply extended a hand toward her. Slowly, she made her way to him. When she stopped in front of him, he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear before leaning in to place a simple peck on her lips. Then he took a bottle of water from her and sat on the sofa. Snuggling into his chest, she drew her knees up next to him. They both ate their sandwiches in silence, watching the fire crackle and pop.

After they had finished, Deacon took her plate and his own, placing them on the table. Leaning back, Deacon extended his legs onto the ottoman. Feeling Rayna shiver, he slipped his arm around her, drawing her in close. He placed a kiss on her temple as he pulled the blanket around them. After a few minutes, Deacon slid his hand under the hem of Rayna's sweatshirt and began tracing lazy circles on the small of her back. Rayna let out a pleasant sigh at his touch before speaking.

"Babe, I am sorry. I know you weren't being insensitive. It's just, accidents, rather, car accidents bring back all those memories," she trailed off.

"I know Ray. And I wasn't just thinking about sex you know? I mean I was, still am. But I was simply trying to comfort you, trying to make you smile. Because you looked like your whole world had been shattered with that phone call."

"I know babe. And I appreciate it. And I didn't mean what I said about 'my' girls either. You know that right?" she pulled her head away from the crook of his neck to look him in the eyes.

"Yes Ray, I do know that," he smiled, bringing his right hand up to trace her jawline.

After looking into her eyes for a few moments, he leaned in, placing a simple kiss on her lips. He began to pull away when Rayna's left hand wrapped around his neck, holding him in place. Quickly her lips parted, her tongue eager to connect with his. He smiled against her lips before allowing her access to his mouth. As her tongue massaged against his, she pushed up onto her knees, before quickly straddling his lap. Knees pressed firmly into the back of the sofa, Rayna relaxed her legs, settling herself on his lap, resuming what had started in his SUV.

After several minutes of shared kisses, wandering hands, and playful biting, Deacon broke the kiss, bringing his hands up to cup her face. He brushed the hair away so he could look into her eyes. She was smiling down at him, eyes shining, happy and content.

"Ray, we can either go to bed, or we can take the next step. It's up to you."

"Deacon, I want you. So much that I ache just thinking about it."

He smiled at her before drawing her in for another kiss. His hands wandered down the front of her body, gently massaging her breasts through the fabric of the sweatshirt. His hands skated down the rest of the way, until they wriggled under the hem, sliding the sweatshirt up her body and over her head. Deacon grinned from ear to ear when he discovered Rayna's bare breasts before him. Pulling her close, he kissed his way down her throat and across both of her collarbones, his tongue flicking across her skin. As his tongue swirled around her left nipple, then her right, Rayna let out a soft moan. When his tongue was replaced with teeth, biting and pulling, Rayna's moans grew significantly louder, her hands tangling in his hair. With his mouth at work, Deacon's hands were sliding up and down her thighs, until they finally settled against her bare bottom, beneath the fabric of her leggings. Gently, he inched her leggings and panties down past her hips, before kissing his way back up to her mouth. When their lips connected, Deacon stood, gently pulling Rayna to him as he turned and laid her down on the sofa. He eased her leggings and panties off as his eyes traveled her naked body. Smiling, he kicked off his boots and jeans, and then pulled off his shirt. Rayna grinned, noticing he hadn't bothered to wear any boxers. Pulling the blanket with him, he climbed on top of Rayna, resting his chest against hers.

"Hi," he smiled down at her.

"Hey yourself," she grinned, feeling his erection pressed against the inside of her thigh.

Before she could say anything more, Deacon's lips were consuming hers as his fingers danced down her body until they reached the wetness that was waiting for him. He moaned against her lips as his fingers began working their magic. Rayna's fingers were busy raking through his hair, before skating down his back, dragging her nails. When they reached his bottom, she gave him a gentle squeeze, before slipping to the front and grasping him. He let out a heavy sigh at her touch. As she began sliding both hands up and down his length, he bit down on her lip, as the speed of his hand increased. When the sensations she was creating were becoming too much, he quickly stopped the movement of his fingers before grabbing her wrists.

He placed a final kiss on her lips before slinking below the blanket. Rayna felt his lips glide down her chest and stomach, stopping to tease her navel. Then his mouth replaced the void his fingers had left. She gasped at the initial contact. Very quickly he was working her toward the edge. As he continued, Rayna began arching her back and bucking her hips, abandoning herself to him. Suddenly, Deacon grasped her hips, his nails digging in slightly. And without warning, he withdrew his tongue, sliding her body towards him as he scrambled on top of her, positioning himself between her thighs. Before her moan of disapproval had rang out, he was inside of her.

Rayna's eyes shot open, meeting his gaze as he pushed in as deep as he could before stopping his movement. She pulled his lips down to meet hers as he slowly swiveled his hips, reacquainting himself with all of her. This simple motion sent her over the edge. Then he began his movement, reveling in the sensation of her clenched tightly around him, her legs caged around his hips, pulling him in as deep as she possibly could.

Deacon continued his quick, deep movements, getting more rough with every claw mark Rayna was peppering across his back and butt. As their hips continued to meet, Rayna pulled him in for another kiss. As she bit down on his bottom lip, hard, he tasted blood, which only urged him on. Leaving her lips, he began a trail down her neck once more. This time it was his teeth leaving a trail. With each scrape and bite, Rayna dug her nails farther into his hips.

Deacon was close and Rayna was nearing the edge once more as he became ravenous of her body. He bit down, pulling on her right nipple, then her left as he withdrew from her. As Rayna's moan of disappointment hit his ears, he pushed back in with all the force he could muster. He hit just the right spot as he swiveled his hips and they came together before he collapsed on top of her.

They stayed like that, watching the fire for several minutes, before Deacon broke their connection, retrieving a bottle of water from the table. Returning, he shifted his body between her and the couch back, pulling her flush against him, resting his hand on her stomach. She rested her hand over his and let a pleasant sigh escape her lips.

"Damn, babe. I can't believe it's been two months. But it was definitely worth the wait," she smiled, rolling to her back to look up at him.

"You're tellin me darlin. Although, I think a shower is probably going to be painful. I've got some nice wounds back he," he smiled nodding over his shoulder.

"Oh babe, I'm sorry," as she gave him an apologetic look, before running a finger along his jaw.

"It is quite alright darlin. It was sexy as hell. I forgot that you like it a little rough sometimes," he grinned before leaning in to kiss her.

"It's true. What can I say? You bring that side outta me Deacon Claybourne."

"Good. We've got a few more days to explore this side of yours," he said, his hand already beginning to travel her body once more.

"We do babe, but before any more explorin happens, we need a shower."

"All right darlin."

He kissed her quickly before standing. He pulled his jeans on, wrapped the blanket around her, and scooped her up, carrying her towards the steps.

"Babe, I have two legs, I can walk ya know."

"I know, but let's face it. It's been two months since you had me, and you were pretty spent after that. Who knows if your legs even work right now?" he laughed as her face scrunched up at him.

"You are shameless, I swear."

"Sure am, but you love it."

Once in the bedroom, he plopped her on the bed, before stepping out of his jeans again. Rayna unwrapped herself from the blanket and stepped toward him. She wrapped her arms around his waist, hugging him tightly. His arms pulled her in closer, his hands gliding up and down her back. With her body pressed against him, Rayna felt Deacon's excitement level rising again. Pulling away slightly, she looked up at him.

"Really babe? Already?"

"Whadya want me to say Ray? You turn me on. 'Specially like this," he nodded his head as his eyes scanned her naked body.

"Well, I guess I don't mind hearin that," she mused, smiling up at him.

Once more, he pulled her body flush against his before leaning down to capture her lips in a chaste kiss. But his hips had collided with hers in just the right spot and a low moan rumbled from his mouth to hers. Quickly peeling herself away from him, she took his hand.

"Okay, down to business. It's shower time."

He grumbled as she dragged him into the bathroom. They both stepped into the stall as she switched on the water. Deacon groaned when the hot spray hit him. Rayna turned to look at him, noticing several bright red, raised claw marks on his chest. He turned quickly to stop the stinging, but felt pain all over again. Rayna brought a hand to cover her mouth as she saw his back and butt. The claw marks in both places had actually bled. Grabbing a wash cloth, Rayna stepped up behind him, gently brushing the rag along his wounds. He winced slightly at first. But quickly silenced himself when he felt her lips peppering kisses across his back. It was a feathery touch and it damn near made him weak in the knees.

Wanting to see her face, he turned in her arms, resting his hands on her waist. As he scanned her body, he noticed bruises already beginning on her collar, breasts, and stomach. Leaning down he traced his tongue over all of the purplish-blue bite marks he had left. A quiet gasp escaped her mouth as his tongue found her breasts. The combination of his tongue and the hot water was almost too much for her. But she knew there was a certain level of tenderness and non-sexual thinking in what he was doing. When he finished, they took turns washing one another, before finally switching the water off.

Deacon wrapped Rayna in a towel first before drying himself and exiting the bathroom. He returned a few minutes later to find Rayna naked, a leg on the counter, lathering herself in lotion. A groan coming from the doorway caused her to look. He had a look of sheer lust in his eyes.

"What?" she asked, her face etched with confusion.

"I forgot how good you look doing that is all," he shook his head, quickly glancing down, "um, I'm gonna go pick up the patio and lock up. I expect to find you naked in that bed when I get back."

Rayna scoffed at his order as he turned on his heel and left the bathroom again. After Rayna had finished her nightly routine, she hung up her towel and made her way across the bedroom to the dresser. She grabbed a t-shirt of Deacon's and slipped it on. She quickly checked the sliding door, then switched the light off. The moon reflecting off of the lake was enough to illuminate the outlines of the furniture. She pulled back the covers and climbed in.

A few minutes later, she felt an arm loop around her waist. Opening her eyes, she sighed. She must have dozed off.

"Ray," he murmured against her neck, "I thought I told ya to be naked?"

"Oh babe, it's only a t-shirt," she turned in his arms to face him, "so I might as well be naked."

"Well, I am actually naked," he grabbed her hand, placing it on his bare butt, "see. Now you need to hold up your end of the bargain."

"Fine," she grumbled, pulling the t-shirt up over her head and tossing it to the floor, "now, can we go to sleep babe? I am exhausted."

"Of course darlin, I just wanted to feel your skin, against mine," he smiled, leaning in to kiss her goodnight.

After the kiss she rolled back to her side, scooting up against him as he looped his arm back around her waist. She tangled her legs between his and interlaced her fingers with his.

"Ray? You still awake?"

"Yeah babe, what's up?" she responded, slightly groggy.

"I love you, more than life itself. And I am so happy we've been given a second chance."

Rayna was instantly wide awake, rolling over once more, she looked deep into his eyes as she began tracing his stubble.

"I love you too babe. Always have. And words can't describe how happy I am."

Leaning in, she kissed him once more. This time, his tongue eagerly met hers. And before she knew what was happening, their kiss had deepened again. Freeing her legs from his, Rayna quickly looped a leg over his waist, pulling his body closer to hers.

"Thought you were tired Ray?" he asked as he broke their kiss.

"I was, but now I wanna show you how happy I am."

Very quickly, round two began. This time there was nothing rough or injury ridden about it. This time, it was slow, passionate, endless love making. Nothing was rushed, there was no biting, clawing, or hair pulling. Foreplay was long and drawn out, entirely about Rayna's pleasure, until it wasn't, then it had been Deacon's turn. The actual sex was slow and deliberate. Three and a half hours later, after a job well done, they both drifted off to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

_Authors note: Sorry the final installment took so long! But thank you to KarenES for betareading. I use Blake Shelton's "Mine Would Be You," in this chapter and all credit belongs to him._

_*I wanted it to be noted that in this chapter there is a former surgeon with addiction problems. The character is purely fictional, but sadly, this happens quite a bit. My aunt is a caseworker for the state and she deals with doctors and surgeons who have prescription drug and alcohol abuse problems._

_As always, please read and review! Enjoy :)_

Chapter 4

Two Days Later

"Oh, Deacon. Don't you dare stop," Rayna muttered between deep sighs.

"Mmhhmm," was all Deacon managed by way of reply as he took in the sight of her.

She was lying on her stomach on the towel they had spread across the dock. In a navy blue two-piece bikini, hair plopped on top of her head in a messy bun, and sweat dotting her back; she was quite a sight. He continued kneading the muscles of her calves, watching her face scrunch in a mixture of pleasure and pain and he knew he had it right.

As he continued massaging her never-ending legs, he recalled the past two days. After falling asleep the first night, they woke in a tangle of sheets the next morning. He had woken first. No surprise at all, most of the covers were wrapped around her body. Still, that hadn't stopped him from looping his arms around her and pulling her close. When the playful nibbles to her ear had succeeded in waking her, he smiled proudly as he leaned back to watch her stir. His breath had caught in his throat when she opened her eyes to smile up at him. It was love, plain and simple, in her beautiful blue eyes. Naturally, the smile she gave him kept them in bed for a few more hours.

They had spent the rest of the day at the lake: swimming, fishing, paddle boat adventures around the inlet, and canoeing. Rayna caught her very own fish, a nice sized catfish. She had, of course, been completely disgusted by the way it flopped and how slimy it looked. So Deacon had designated her to hold the pole steady while he took it off the hook. Steady had not translated, and when the fish flopped on the hook, Rayna jerked the pole, allowing the stinger to connect with Deacon's hand a few times. Everyone on the lake probably heard the loud "fuck!" that had boomed from his throat. After that it had been decided that they wouldn't fish.

On their mid-morning paddle boat excursion, they had discovered a small cove. The entrance was just wide enough for a small boat. The area was only about five foot deep and there was a trail at the shoreline. They could tell it had simply been worn by lots of foot traffic. It had been decided that they would have to come back at some point for further exploration. Later that day, they had brought the canoe back, but hadn't made it to the shore. Instead, Deacon decided to create a game out of keeping the canoe balanced while having quick and dirty sex. Somehow they had managed to succeed, before falling asleep floating in the cove.

That night they had barely finished dinner, sitting at the large table, which was too big for only two, when Rayna had practically pounced on him. Dishes were scattered, drinks were spilled, and her shirt was ripped open as he laid her on the table. His mouth had just made contact with her most intimate spot, when a swift knock on the door stopped them both. Rayna had given him the slight nod to go ahead and answer it. After adjusting the tightness in his jeans, he had opened the door to find the lodge attendant. He was simply checking to make sure they were enjoying themselves. After a few minutes of polite conversation, Deacon got rid of him. Returning to the table he had stopped in his tracks. Rayna was sitting on the edge, very seductively, wearing nothing but the whipped cream. He had smirked at her, thankful he had gotten it for the pie. Needless to say, they had both gotten their fill of dessert before falling asleep.

Another moan escaping Rayna's throat brought Deacon back to reality. He was massaging the top of her hamstring, brushing the edge of her ass. Feeling himself beginning to harden, he finished and stood to stretch his legs.

"So Ray, want me to do your front?" he asked with a chuckle.

"Now, I don't think I can trust you to just massage if I allow that Deacon Claybourne," she said, smiling as she rolled to her back, propping herself up on her elbows. She was facing the water and the sun was in her eyes. Bringing a hand up to shield the brightness, she grinned.

He was in such fantastic shape. His trunks hugged his waist and at 44, he still had the wonderful v-cut. Granted, much less defined than it used to be, but there nonetheless. His stomach was taut and his chest was still chiseled. As her eyes raked over him once more, they became focused on the slight strain in the material between his thighs.

"Now what makes you say that Ray?" he grinned down at her.

"That," she nodded toward the slight bulge.

"Sorry Ray, can't help it. You let me massage your legs. And I sat there thinkin about you and whipped cream," he smiled, lowering himself to sit beside her, his back to the sun.

As he smiled at her, he leaned in, capturing her lips in a chaste kiss. He pulled back, still leaning on his arm as he looked into her eyes. Rayna looked down and laughed at the strategic placement of his palm. His hand was between her thighs, flat on the dock, his pinkie and thumb gently brushing her thighs.

"Really babe? You are ridiculous. A simple massage can't even remain a simple massage."

"Ray," he leaned in, kissing her shoulder, then her neck, before whispering in her ear, "I can't help it. Especially with the very little clothing you have on right now."

Before pulling away he gently nibbled on her earlobe. Then he stood, gave her a wink, and turned toward the water. In three quick steps he was springing off of the dock and into the water. When he resurfaced he shook his head back and forth, brushing his soaked hair out of his face. As he locked his gaze with Rayna, he licked his lips before giving her a very wicked grin.

"You comin in Ray? It's awful hot sitting up there."

"Nope, I think I am just fine right here. In fact the only thing I need to stay cool is this," she smiled as her hand found the cooler behind her. Reaching inside she pulled out an ice cube.

"Rayna," Deacon said, in a growl of a voice, half desire and half agitation.

She didn't respond, only continued to meet his gaze as he floated out from the dock, treading water. When she began tracing the ice cube along her arms, then across her chest, down the other arm, and over her abdomen, his eyes left hers. She continued watching him, knowing she was driving him crazy. Once the ice cube reached her thighs, she heard a faint groan. She looked up to see Deacon tipping his head back, positioning himself into a back float.

Quickly, the now very prominent bulge in his trunks caught her eye. But he wasn't moving, simply floating, and avoiding her gaze. After a few more moments of contemplation, she stood. With a hand on her hip and a slight grin playing on her lips she spoke again.

"Deacon?"

"Yes Ray?" he managed without looking at her.

"If I come in there, you have to keep your hands to yourself. It's dirty and there are fish."

"_You haven't seen dirty yet darlin," he thought to himself._

"Of course I will Ray. Scout's honor," he chuckled, holding up three fingers.

With that, Rayna approached the edge of the dock and dipped a toe in the water. It felt wonderful. She took a few steps back, and then in one quick motion, sprang off the dock and into the water with a splash. Upon surfacing she looked around, but Deacon was nowhere in sight.

It was then she felt his hands on her thighs, sliding up her body as he surfaced behind her. He placed a kiss on her neck before pulling her tightly against him.

"Deacon," she gasped, "you scared me half to death. And you told me you would keep your hands to yourself."

"Ray, my fingers were crossed. And speaking of fingers," he trailed off as his hand slipped inside the front of her swimming suit bottoms.

Very briefly, and ever so gently, he slid a finger up and down her. When her head tipped back against his shoulder, he knew he had her. He looped an arm around her waist and began swimming backwards, around the side of the dock until his feet touched the sandy bottom. Then he scooped her up and walked her to the shore, snatching the towel off the dock along the way.

"Deacon, what on earth are we…" He silenced her inquiry with his lips.

Gently his tongue made its way into her mouth. When they reached the combination of sand and grass at the water's edge, he tossed the towel down and plopped Rayna down along with it. He could already tell she was about to protest the location as her eyes danced across the water, no doubt spotting all the people. They were in view of the beach just across the lake. And he knew she would suggest they just go into the house.

"Ray, the idea of being seen adds a whole other level of sexiness to what's about to happen," he smiled, nudging her thighs apart so he could settle between them.

"Deacon, we're in sand. There is nothing sexy about all the places sand can end up," she smiled, leaning back on her elbows.

Still resting on his knees, Deacon contemplated her statement. Leaning towards her, he ran his hands up her thighs, along her sides, until they slid around to the middle of her back.

"In about 5 seconds Ray, you're not gonna care."

"Really?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow at him.

As quickly as he smiled at her, her top was untied even faster and his mouth was on her left breast, then her right. The sensation of his tongue on her body made her arms shake and she quickly fell flat on her back. Lost in the cloud of lust, she hadn't even realized Deacon had untied the strings on her bottoms, until his hand was caressing her freely. When he felt how wet she was, he groaned against her chest. Lifting his head up, he looked into her eyes.

"God Ray," he groaned as he slid up and down her.

"Deacon, please," she sighed as he slipped two fingers inside her.

Deacon simply smiled, before bringing his lips down to meet hers as he continued stroking her. As he broke the kiss Rayna's voiced echoed loudly.

"Jesus Deacon!" she cried out, as his fingers swiveled around inside of her.

"Quiet Ray, noise carries on the water," he murmured against her lips.

"Deacon," she gasped faintly, "I need you, now," as she reached between them, grasping him through his trunks.

Quickly, he slid his trunks past his hips, barely breaking their contact. Just as quickly as his fingers left her, he entered her, groaning against her neck. There was a strong sense of urgency that came with their location. Being in public heightened their senses and made them demand more with each meeting of their hips.

Deacon panted and gasped against Rayna's neck as she bit down on his shoulder to muffle her cries with each sharp thrust he made. They were both nearing the edge as Deacon lifted his head to look into her eyes. Pure unadulterated pleasure filled her eyes. She reached up to cup his face, pulling him towards her. Just before their lips met, she whispered against his.

"I love you so much babe."

As the words escaped her lips, they were followed by a deep moan as she reached the edge, tightening around him. The feeling of her muscles contracting and the wave of pleasure washing over her features made him follow suit, before collapsing against her. After a few minutes of catching their breath, Deacon brought his face up to look at Rayna. Her eyes were closed and a faint grin playing across her lips. He couldn't help but smile.

"You okay darlin?"

"Never better babe," she smiled, eyes still closed.

"All right, good," he grinned, before leaning in to place a quick kiss on her lips.

Then he broke their connection as he moved back up to his knees, pulling his trunks back around his waist. As he pulled Rayna's bottoms back into place and began tying them, he felt water begin to slosh around his ankles. Glancing over his shoulder, he noticed a small fishing boat heading their direction.

"Ray" he whispered, nudging her thighs, "you may wanna put your top back on. Looks like we've got company."

"Huh?" her eyes quickly darted open, looking over his shoulder.

Panic washed over her face when she realized her top wasn't beside her.

"Babe, where is my top?"

"Oh, um," Deacon glanced around and spotted it a few feet behind her head. Just as he saw it he heard the call from a man behind them. If he had to guess, they were maybe 50 yards away.

"Hey there folks! Mind if we dock for a minute?"

Deacon reached over Rayna as he grabbed her top. Quickly, he looped it over her head before pulling her up to him to shield her from their view. He smiled at her as she fumbled with the tie as he yelled over his shoulder.

"Sure thing," he paused, waiting for her nod that she was finished. When she smiled, he turned and waved them in, "come on in."

He stood, extending a hand to Rayna to help her up. They climbed onto the dock as a boat approached. An older couple, mid 60s, were situated in the boat, full fishing gear in tow. They both smiled as the pulled up to the dock.

"How you kids doing today?" the gentleman asked.

"We're doin just fine," Deacon smiled, taking Rayna's hand as she nodded.

The man was tall and fit. He had the tanned skin only a farmer could have. And his well-worn John Deere trucker hat only solidified that conclusion. The woman was a petite thing, equally as tan as her husband. Both wore contagious smiles that filled their eyes. Based on the crow's feet they both had, Deacon could tell they had lived a life filled with things to smile about.

"Well, I am George Hartman, this is my wife Darlene," he nodded towards the woman, "we don't wanna bother you two, but we're big fans and we wanted to extend an invitation to dinner. See, we live here during the summer, just across the lake, and this is the first time we've had anyone of your status stay here."

"And obviously, we don't want to seem to forward. Having just come over uninvited and all, but Stan, the manager said y'all were so nice. We figured what the heck," Darlene said, giving them a reassuring smile.

Deacon looked at Rayna, who smiled, nodding her head before she spoke.

"That sounds just great y'all, we would love that."

"Absolutely," Deacon nodded in agreement.

"Oh perfect!" Darlene beamed, "Come on over, say 6:30?"

"Sounds great. Would you like us to bring anything?" Rayna asked.

"Well," George paused, "I think we have the food and drinks covered. If you two would be up for some campfire singing, you could bring along a guitar if you brought one."

"Now that we did," Deacon piped up, "we'd love to do that."

"Great, we will see you tonight," George smiled, before pushing off from the dock.

Rayna and Deacon stood arm-in-arm watching them pull away. When they were off in the distance, Deacon turned to Rayna.

"So how long do you think this dinner will last?"

"Oh Deacon, they are a sweet old couple. Interaction with some other people for a few hours won't kill you."

"I didn't say it would. I'm just wondering how long I am gonna have to keep my hands to myself is all?" he smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Honestly babe, you are gonna be the death of me," she grabbed his hand leading him off the dock, "C'mon, we had better get cleaned up."

"Ray, we still have like three hours."

"I know," she turned to look up at him, "but I would like to shower and take a nap with you."

"You really think we will actually take a shower? And a nap? Darlin' that isn't gonna happen."

"Well, what do you say we give it our best shot?"

**3 Hours Later**

Deacon's fingers intertwined with Rayna's as they began their walk around the lake to the Hartman's cabin. With his guitar in the other hand, he couldn't help but smile down at her. He was beaming with happiness; their vacation was just going so well. When she caught him staring, she gave him a wry smile.

"Whatcha lookin at cowboy?"

"Well, if you must know," he smirked at her, raising an eyebrow, "the most beautiful woman in the world," followed by a wink.

"That's sweet babe, but it's not gonna get you a tumble in the woods on our walk over there," she responded, laughing as he scrunched up his face at her words.

"All have you know Ray, that was a no-strings-attached compliment."

"Sure it was babe."

"Seriously darlin. But I really can't believe we actually showered. And took a nap," he stated as he shot her a look of disbelief.

"Well babe, I respected your willpower. Especially considering I didn't even manage to get dressed before I practically passed out on the bed."

A groan escaped his lips as he recalled the sight when he had emerged from the bathroom: Rayna. Naked. Lying on her side, back towards him. She was hugging the sheet to her chest, with her leg thrown over the top of the covers. Her naked backside was completely exposed.

"Yeah darlin, believe me, my heart nearly stopped at that sight. But let's not have me relivin it hmm? Or we won't make it to dinner on time."

Rayna couldn't help but laugh at the expression he gave her with that statement. From the fire in his eyes, she knew they wouldn't be doing much sleeping when they returned to the cabin later. She let out a content sigh as they made the rest of their walk in silence. It was nearly impossible to describe the love she felt for him, and the love he felt for her. This vacation had been exactly what they needed.

As they approached the Hartman's cabin, George and Darlene were on the front porch, holding hands, perched on a pair of rocking chairs. Darlene spotted them first and jumped up to greet them.

"Well there you two are!" she gushed excitedly as they reached the steps.

"Yes! We're so thrilled to be here," Rayna stated, smiling back as Darlene extended a hand to her. Rayna shook it proudly, happy these nice people had invited them over.

As Deacon's arm brushed hers to shake Darlene's, she glanced up at him. His eyes gave him away, he too was happy to be there, despite his earlier grumblings.

"Well, I'll be," George mused nodding to Deacon, "you brought the guitar. That mean we're in for a musical treat later?" he asked, extending a hand to Deacon. Deacon shook it and smiled, nodding to Rayna.

"Absolutely. As long as I can talk this one into singing with me. We haven't done that in a while."

"Well, Rayna," George spoke softly, taking both of her hands in his, "do you think you'd be up for that? We'd just love to hear y'all."

"I think we can do somethin."

"Perfect," he smiled, glancing at Darlene, "well, let's get inside and get some food."

They all made their way into the cabin. It was much smaller than the one Deacon and Rayna were staying in, but it was beautiful, older and rustic. Just like Deacon's cabin. The main floor was wide open, except for the bathroom just off the kitchen. A set of steps leading up to a loft separated the living room from a sitting room filled with shelves of books.

The dinner Darlene had prepared was fabulous: marinated chicken breast, mashed potatoes and gravy, grilled asparagus, and the most delicious peach cobbler Rayna had ever eaten. Conversation during dinner was filled with tour stories, Rayna's and Deacon's childhoods, and what Nashville was really like. As they made their way through dessert, Rayna coaxed George and Darlene into sharing some things about themselves. They lived in St. Louis. George had been a cardiothoracic surgeon before he retired a few years earlier. Darlene was a school librarian and they had raised their family on a small farm just outside of the city. It was a hobby farm with some chickens, horses, and a small field they now rented out.

After they finished, Rayna and Darlene cleared the dishes and cleaned up while the men got a fire going on the patio. Deacon brought his guitar outside and then helped George situate the chairs. Once everything was in place the men took their seats, watching for the ladies to emerge.

"So," George began, "I, um, heard about your accident. Not trying to pry, but how are you two healin up?"

"Well," Deacon took a breath, shifting in his seat, "it's been a long road. That's for sure. This vacation has been our starting over period if you will."

George took a deep breath and exhaled, almost unsure whether he should say what came next. Running a hand over his jaw, he spoke again.

"Well son, I'd like to give you some advice if I may," he paused, glancing at Deacon, who gave him a nod, "that gal in there loves you. I mean, really loves you. Would give her life for you. I can see it in her eyes. See, I've been around a long time. Made a lot of mistakes. Some very similar to your own," he finished, glancing at Deacon again, his eyes saying more than words could.

Deacon fixed his gaze at George. George gave him a nod as Deacon processed his words and it finally clicked. George was a recovering alcoholic too. He thought he had noticed it during dinner. The way George held his glass of tea. It was with the same comfort and ease that Deacon held his, like the glass belonged in their hands. Then he had added the unconscious swirl of the liquid in the glass before taking a drink. Some habits died harder than others with addicts.

"Yeah? How many times?" Deacon asked, a pained expression on his face.

"It took me six trips and the loss of a child to get straightened out."

"Oh, wow. I'm so sorry. If you don't mind me asking, what happened?"

George paused again. Deacon could tell he was reliving every moment of what he was about to divulge.

"Well, my drinking started as a coping mechanism. Bein a doctor ain't all that glamorous. People dyin definitely ain't glamorous. But somewhere along the way, it took a turn. I woke up one day and realized I couldn't remember the last time I had come home and made love to my wife sober. I would get off a shift and go into a bender. Then the accident happened. Our youngest, he came into my office one morning, I was passed out on the couch. Hung over, maybe even still drunk. He asked if he could take the four-wheeler out into the field. He was 10, he had driven it a number, just not by himself. I didn't even think twice before I gave him the go-ahead and went back to sleep."

Taking a deep breath, he ran a hand through his silver hair as he continued.

"I woke up to the screams. He had been driving and popped up out the ditch onto the road. The driver of the truck didn't even see him. When I got out to the road, he was pinned between the four-wheeler and the ground, smashed under the front end of the truck." Letting out a heavy sigh, he glanced at Deacon, whose gaze was pointed at his boots, "They said he died on impact. The driver was just a young kid, late for his sports practice."

"George, I – uh – I'm so very sorry," Deacon muttered.

"Thank you. But my point with telling you that son, is to tell you that love really can conquer everything. I heard about the paternity stuff with you and Rayna. I know that's why you fell off the wagon and why y'all are up here startin over. My advice, love her. And don't stop. Love that child. Be happy." He reached a hand out, placing it on Deacon's shoulder, gaining his eye contact, "And forgive her, completely."

"Thank you," Deacon whispered, nodding as he wiped a tear from the corner of his eye.

A few moments later the ladies emerged, cups of coffee in hand. As Rayna sat down, Deacon took her hand. Bringing it to his mouth, he placed a gentle kiss on her hand.

"I know," she whispered, leaning in to kiss his cheek.

When she pulled back, he could see her misty eyes. He realized Darlene had just had the same conversation with Rayna. He smiled to himself, thinking how certain pieces just fall into place.

George motioned for everyone to sit around the fire. Rayna and Deacon took the love seat, while George and Darlene took the chairs opposite them. After everyone was settled, George nodded toward Deacon's guitar as he spoke.

"Well, how about we hear some music from you two?" he asked with a smile.

Deacon looked at Rayna, who nodded. He smiled as he opened the case and pulled his Martin out.

"Any requests?" Deacon asked, looking at Darlene.

"Well, one of my favorites of y'all has always been _No One Will Ever Love You."_

Again Deacon looked at Rayna, who gave her smile of approval. He grinned back and began the chords to one of their greatest love songs. Through the entire song, they didn't break their eye contact. George and Darlene watched in amazement at the love they were witnessing. As the couple began the final chorus, George took Darlene's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. When Deacon strummed the final chord, he glanced at the older couple. He could see a glimmer of tears in Darlene's eyes.

"Well, hope that wasn't too bad. I haven't played that song in so long," Deacon mused, remembering how far he and Rayna had come since the Bluebird.

"It was beautiful," Darlene remarked, barely more than a whisper.

"Yes lovely," George chimed in, "do you have anything new? We could be your test audience."

"I can't say that I do," Rayna frowned, "haven't been doin much writin lately. What about you babe?" she asked turning to Deacon.

"Actually Ray, I do. I just finished it the other day," he answered, smiling at her.

"Well then we better hear it," George encouraged with a clap.

"All right, this one is called _Mine Would Be You,"_ Deacon replied, as he began the opening chords.

_What's your all time high, your good as it gets?  
Your hands down best ever make-up sex?  
What's your guilty pleasure, your old go to?  
Well if you asked me, mine would be you._

Rayna let out a heavy sigh as she internalized his words. They struck her right in the heart. As he began the next portion he looked at her, meeting her gaze.

_What's your worst hangover, your best night yet?  
Your 90 proof, your Marlboro Red?  
The best damn thing you lucked into?  
That's easy girl, mine would be you._

He winked at her as he took a breath before entering the chorus.

_Mine would be you, sun keeps shining,  
Back road flying, singing like crazy fools.  
Makin up our own words, laughin til it hurts.  
Baby if I had to choose, my best day ever,  
My finest hour, my wildest dream come true  
Mine would be you._

Rayna could not help the tears that were beginning to form in her eyes as he was strumming into the second verse. She quickly glanced down as his words filled her ears again.

_What's your double dare, your go all in?  
The craziest thing you ever did?  
Plain as your name in this tattoo.  
Look on my arm, mine would be you._

Deacon could tell his words were affecting her, getting right to her heart, right where he wanted them to go. He smiled to himself as he sang the chorus again. She still wasn't looking at him. As he strummed into the final verse, he gently nudged her with his knee so he could make eye contact with her. When she met his gaze, he continued.

_What's the greatest chapter in your book?  
Are there pages where it hurts to look?  
What's the one regret you can't work through?  
You got it baby, mine would be you.  
Yeah you got it baby, mine would be you._

Tears were falling freely down her cheeks as he continued into the bridge of the song.

_Mine would be you.  
Taillights fading, daylight breaking.  
Standing there like a fool,  
When I shoulda been running,  
Yelling out something,  
To make you wanna hold on to.  
The best love ever. Girl can you tell me,  
The one thing you'd rather die than lose?  
Cause mine would be you.  
Mine would be you._

As he finished the song, he quickly set his guitar down, cupping Rayna's face with his hands. He gently brushed away the tears, before leaning in to kiss her. It was gentle and full of love. As soon as he heard the applause from George and Darlene, he pulled away and gave them a smile.

"That was absolutely beautiful," Darlene cheered.

"I agree completely, but I think it is getting late," George said, glancing down at his watch.

Darlene looked at him, ready to protest, but quieted quickly when he motioned towards Rayna and Deacon. They were sitting there, foreheads rested against one another, beaming at each other.

"I think you're right," Deacon said in agreement, giving him a nod of thanks as he pulled away from Rayna completely.

He stood up and placed his guitar in its case. Then he turned to Darlene and George. He shook George's hand and gave Darlene a hug and kiss on the cheek. Rayna then made the rounds, hugging Darlene and George.

"You've got a good one there," George whispered to her as he kissed her on the cheek.

"Thank you," she said with a smile before turning back to Darlene, "and thank you both for the hospitality, this was wonderful."

"I agree completely. This was a wonderful evening and were so glad to have met you both," Deacon finished.

Walking back to their cabin, Rayna and Deacon were silent most of the way. As they strolled under the stars, Rayna finally stopped at the top of their porch and pulled Deacon into a hug.

"I love you so much babe. And that song was beautiful," she murmured against his chest.

"I love you too darlin. And I meant every word," he stated, placing his guitar on the ground, "look at me Ray."

"Yes?" she asked, finally peering up at him.

"I _mean _every word. You are the one thing I'd rather die than lose. It's taken a lot to figure that out. All the years we lost. I don't blame you for the choice you made with Maddie. And after talking to George, I truly get it. I thank you for sticking around, for being there, always. And I can't wait to build the rest of our lives together."

"I know babe. And I am glad to hear you say that. But I stuck around because you are my soul mate. No matter what, I will always love you. I've always loved you. It's always been you."

Deacon looked at her for another moment before pulling her into a passionate kiss. After a few moments like that he picked her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist. No even bothering with his guitar, he carried her into the cabin, for what they both knew would be a sleepless night.


End file.
